Most London boroughs are named after either large towns or something historically apposite. Not many are named after villages, and one of the humblest of these is Hillingdon.
The original intention had been to call the borough Uxbridge, indeed this had been the Ministry of Housing and Local Government's preferred choice. But of the four constituent authorities only the Municipal Borough of Uxbridge was keen, whereas Hayes and Harlington Urban District, Ruislip-Northwood Urban District and Yiewsley and West Drayton Urban District would all have preferred "almost anything else". Amongst the alternatives put forward were Elthorne, West Middlesex, Heathrow and the frankly obsequious Queensborough (as Heathrow was where the Queen had first set foot in England after her accession). Late in the day 'Hillingdon' was put forward and eventually won a run-off with West Middlesex, hence a small village on the Uxbridge Road is now nominally home to 330,000 people.
Hillingdon gets a mention in the Domesday Book (which is more than Uxbridge does), its population recorded as 2 villagers, 2 smallholders, 1 cottager, 5 other households and 1000 pigs. A church was built here in the mid 13th century, occupying an ideal hilltop site on a well-drained patch of glacial gravels. Uxbridge was soon a larger market town, straddling a key bridging point over the River Colne, but strangely remained part of the parish of Hillingdon until it was split off in 1866. Hillingdon was still an isolated stop on the main road until suburbia encroached in the 1920s, and even now the tube station of the same name is over a mile north of the village centre.
The church on the hilltop is St John The Baptist, its flint tower poking above tall conifers amid a crammed churchyard. Its historical provenance really stands out as you drive along the Uxbridge Road, an endless succession of semis and drab arterial businesses suddenly replaced by a characterful cluster of heritage buildings. In good news the church welcomes visitors daily so anyone can step inside and enjoy a slice of old Middlesex, and perhaps also a coffee if the rector's lurking by the kettle in the south aisle. I could tell it was going to be an interesting building as soon as I spotted three free leaflets ensuring visitors don't miss anything, including the 497 year-old effigy by the altar and the fine detail in the stained glass East Window.
The oldest part of the church is the chancel arch, dated 1270, although it used to be four feet six lower before a young architect by the name of George Gilbert Scott recommended raising it to form the focal point of his enlarged nave. The finest feature is probably the Le Strange Brass, a tomb-top now found in the south aisle, which Pevsner described as "the most ambitious brass of the middle ages to survive in Greater London". The six foot slab depicts the 8th Lord Strange (1444-1479) and his wife Jacquetta, sister of Edward IV's queen Elizabeth, with an additional brasswork of their daughter Anne squeezed into a small gap at the bottom. The font looks to be equally old but is actually a Victorian replica of a 15th century font found in Happisburgh, Norfolk. St John's' carol service is this Sunday if you prefer a more worshipful visit.
The recreation ground beyond the churchyard is called Coney Green, a name thought to be derived from its former use as a rabbit warren. This is also the site of a Palaeolithic settlement, perhaps as substantial as a hillfort, whose earthworks are still evident as a broken bank almost quarter of a mile in length. I struggled to see much of a hump or ditch along the edge of the football pitch, although apparently the cricket pavilion had to be carefully positioned to make sure it didn't damage the embankment. You can see all of this from the top deck of the Superloop, by the way, although it's telling that the SL8 doesn't bother to stop in the village the borough's named after, only at what used to be Hillingdon Heath back down the hill.
Across the road is The Red Lion, a timber-framed coaching inn with pleasingly higgledy frontage. Its key moment in history came on 27th April 1646 when Charles I dropped in while on the run from the New Model Army in Oxford. The king arrived with two close friends while posing as a servant called Harry, having had his signature hair and beard trimmed overnight with scissors in an attempt at a non-royal disguise. The trio spent a few hours drinking here in Hillingdon while trying to plot the best route to meet reinforcements in Newark, a circuitous trip which inevitably didn't end well. Had they arrived more recently they could perhaps have enjoyed a limited menu of pizzas, burgers and ribeye steak, and also a bed in the hotel annexe sensitively wedged behind the listed building in 2003.
The north side of the road, for a few hundred metres at least, is an attractive mix of Tudor and Tudorbethan. Cedar House is fundamentally 16th century and seriously gabled with proper white and black struts. It's named after the towering tree out front which is said to have been planted by a renowned botanist who lived here 300 years ago, and is now an old people's home. Meanwhile the row of cottages on the brow of the hill was demolished during road widening in 1935 and is now the pleasingly-retro home of The Village chippy and the Manor Launderama. It makes my local den of washing machines look positively ordinary in comparison.
Most of the manorial estates around the village are now housing estates, although one turrety mansion survives as the heart of Bishopshalt, a secondary school in prime premises certain private establishments could only dream of. It's more fruitful to continue down Royal Lane to the site of Hillingdon Grove, itself long replaced by lesser homes but whose Victorian country garden survives as a London Wildlife Trust nature reserve. A slightly muddy trudge through oak woodland leads to a secluded ornamental pool, once some gardener's pride and joy but now colonised by pondweed and a family of ducks. I was particularly taken by the raucous birdsong on all sides, far more than you'd normally hear in December, which can't only have come from the magpies I spotted.
Two more mansions survive to the north up Vine Lane, once the rural backway to Ickenham. One's Hillingdon Court which has become an all-through international school posh enough to shuttle its pupils in from Beaconsfield and Notting Hill. You won't see that, it's too well shielded. The other is Hillingdon House, a Georgian pile overlooking the River Pinn which now comprises a luxury banqueting hall and premium serviced offices. Its grounds were requisitioned by the Royal Air Force during WW1 and then during WW2 No 11 Group Fighter Command moved in, hence you can now visit the excellent Battle of Britain Bunker visitor centre for an underground tour. Everyone always thinks that's in Uxbridge, the high street being so close, but being the other side of the river it's technically in historic Hillingdon.
So the Hillingdon everyone knows as a London borough in fact derives its name from a medieval village that's still partly in situ, but only if you know where to look.
On Friday I went to Westfield in Stratford, arriving via the big footbridge that crosses over the station. It was busy with people walking to and fro.
On the far side, just before everything opens out to the shops, two cameras had been set up in the middle of the walkway.
(nobody was fiddling with the camera the first time I passed, I took this photo on my way back)
They were serious-looking cameras supported on a tripod, like something you might find pointed towards you in an operating theatre or dentist's chair. One pointed towards those arriving on the left-hand side and the other those arriving on the right, ensuring there was no way you could walk past without being scrutinised. Cables connected the cameras to a power/communication gizmo on the floor and a ring of red plastic barriers ensured nobody walked into them. I wonder what that's about, I thought.
Outside the entrance to Marks & Spencer a big red van had been parked in the middle of the piazza. It had another camera on the roof, and another camera on the roof, also a globe camera on the roof, also sensors on the roof, also four tiny black plastic aerials stuck just above the windscreen. Two more globe cameras hung from a pole positioned beside the van, also another two on the other side of the van, also a sensor on a taller pole pointing forwards towards the cameras I'd seen earlier. A lot of yellow cables threaded out of the van, protected by a strip of blue and white police tape lest any shoppers accidentally disturb them.
I had a pretty good idea what this was but I asked anyway, approaching one of the gentlemen setting up equipment around the van. "It's for a facial recognition deployment we're doing later," he said. Well of course it was.
I was unnerved that the Met Police can just turn up in a certain area and start filming everyone, literally everyone that walks past. Sure there are already CCTV cameras everywhere in London but they're not necessarily good quality, nor are they being constantly monitored, nor do they have the specific intention of catching ne'erdowells going about their daily business. I start to see now why some teenagers who may or may not be lowlife insist on going everywhere with a mask across half their face.
But mostly I was reassured they hadn't started filming yet. I had no particular reason to be concerned, criminally speaking, but I still don't like being the object of overt surveillance while I'm out and about. They hadn't started filming when I came back either, this because they were only just getting the red signs out of the van saying Police Live Facial Recognition In Operation. Admittedly me taking photos of a set-up intended to take photos of me is a bit hypocritical, but at least my subjects weren't facing towards from the camera.
Yesterday I found myself at the crossroads outside Tottenham Court Road station, bang in the middle of the West End, and there they were again.
This time it was a white van rather than red, this time with a single pole supporting at least four cameras, but the intended outcome was the same. I presume this deployment was live because six police officers were standing around on duty, in two groups of three, ready to leap into action on a positive identification. But I didn't see a sign anywhere, perhaps because the crowds milling around were blocking it or perhaps because it was pointing a different way. I was especially uncomfortable at the lack of notification, if indeed it was live, as if this were a trap they were hoping people wouldn't notice.
Had I thought to check the Met's facial recognition webpage before I set out yesterday, I might have been warned.
On Monday 01 December 2025 we are deploying Live Facial Recognition Technology to crime hotspots in Waltham Forest, Camden and Westminster borough. The people we are seeking to locate at crime hotspots are set out in our policy.
Reading more, I discovered how Live Facial Recognition Technology (LFR) is undertaken...
LFR cameras are focused on a specific area; when people pass through that area their images are streamed directly to the Live Facial Recognition system and compared to a watchlist.
So it's about looking for specific people in specific places.
I also found out what the process is...
1. Construction of watchlist (this uses "images of Sought Persons", then analyses their faces as a set of numerical values)
2. Facial image acquisition (via a live feed of persons who appear within the "Zone of Recognition")
3. Face detection (software detects individual human faces within the images captured)
4. Feature extraction (software produces a "Biometric Template" of features of each detected face)
5. Face comparison (Biometric Template is compared with Watchlist Biometric Templates)
6. Matching (alert generated if "similarity score" surpasses pre-set threshold value)
7. Consideration of matched images (trained officer compares Candidate Image against Watchlist Image and takes action if required)
8. LFR data destruction (in the absence of an alert, Biometric Template immediately and automatically deleted)
So it's not just taking photos of everyone and stashing them away.
The policy document also explained what the definition of "a crime hotspot" is...
A crime hotspot is a small geographical area of approximately 300-500m across where crime data and/or MPS intelligence reporting and/or operational experience as to future criminality indicates that that it is an area where:
(i) the crime rate; and/or
(ii) the rate at which crime in that area is rising,
is assessed to be in the upper quartile for that BCU/OCU area.
That's at least 25% of the capital, so technically the Met could set up their scanners all over London.
Best of all I discovered the Met have provided data on all their LFR deployments undertaken this year.
In their 9 page document we learn that there have been 201 LFR operations this year (up until 21st November), an average of 4 or 5 a week. We learn that the Met's watchlist contains about 16,000 suspects (or 0.2% of the population of London). We learn that the average LFR session lasts just under 6 hours (maximum 9h 44m during the Notting Hill Carnival). We learn that the average number of alerts during a session is just 10 (95% of the time it's less than 20). We learn that only 12 False Alerts have been confirmed (a false alert rate of 0.0003%). We learn that 3,513,399 faces have been scanned altogether. And we learn that 1013 arrests have been made in total (an average of 5 each time).
I've also analysed where each of the 201 deployments took place. The most surveilled location is North End (Croydon) with 11 deployments, followed by Powis Street (Woolwich) with 8, then Stratford Broadway with 7 and Oxford Circus with 7. At least 30 locations have only been visited once. The most visited borough is Westminster with 32 deployments followed by Newham with 23. The only other boroughs with more than 10 visits are Croydon and Brent. Interestingly every borough has had at least one visit, as if the Met are deliberately ticking them all off (except for Barnet, Harrow and Kensington & Chelsea, although there are still five weeks of the year to go).
Excluding the Notting Hill Carnival, the highest number of faces scanned in one session was 47,659 at Oxford Circus on Thursday 2nd October. That's an average of 146 faces every minute. The second busiest location is Westfield Stratford which has had 30,000-40,000 scans on each of the four occasions they've turned up. The fewest number of scans was 2490 in 5¾hrs on Mare Street (Hackney) on Tuesday 6th May. The greatest number of arrests was 16 on August 12th on Brixton Road. On only six occasions did the Met drive off without making an arrest.
I'm now more reassured than I was before I studied the policy and investigated the data. The cameras are only being used to track 16,000 people and if you're not on the watchlist your data isn't retained. But it does seem wasteful to have despatched so many resources on 201 occasions and only come away with 1000 arrests, not all of which will have been for something very serious. It also continues to feel uncomfortable walking past these camera set-ups, even if you know you've done nothing wrong.
Live Facial Recognition is certainly a cunning way of creaming criminals off the streets who wouldn't normally be caught. If the police are doing their job well it can only help make us a little safer. But if the algorithm's off then the wrong people will be stopped, certain subgroups more than others, simply because they went out shopping. What I still find discomforting is the normalisation of intrusive overt surveillance on our streets without due warning, so on balance I'd be happy to see LFR deployments cease. I am perhaps less worried about now and more concerned about a future society in which the police and/or government use this technology in pursuit of a warped agenda, rooting out unacceptable citizens with the flick of a camera.
Watch out for yourself on our streets because they might be watching you.
Sat 1: Spotted a doomed pillarbox in Beckenham High Street wrapped in plastic film, ready to be updated to one of those new solar-powered automated boxes. I wonder what they do with the boxes that get replaced. Sun 2: The sheer irony of a narrowboat on the Grand Union Canal, clearly Reform-friendly, flying a 'Stop the Boats' flag.
Mon 3: Celebrity spotting: On Bow Road I passed former Poldark-scyther Aidan Turner, which shouldn't have been surprising because we both live on the same street. Tue 4: Celebrity spotting: Outside Finsbury Park station I passed someone famous I couldn't place ("oh I know that face, who is that?"). Eventually I worked out it was Ru Paul's Drag Race champion Ginger Johnson, but not in full make-up. Wed 5: The top end of Crystal Palace Park is a vast sealed-off mess at present as the Italian Terrace undergoes a full makeover to make it more appealing and accessible. Should be great eventually, but don't visit soon.
Thu 6: On 2nd September I saw an e-unicyclist and said I was going to count how many days it was before I saw another one. I finally saw another today so it took 65 days, that's how rare these beasts are. Perhaps TfL could stop making regular announcements about a form of transport that barely exists, thanks. Fri 7: OK, maybe the lampposts between Crayford and Erith are London's flaggiest. Sat 8: I attended the very first Lady Mayor's Show, the previous 700-odd all having been Lord Mayor's Shows. The parade's always a slightly surreal combination of portly men in gowns waving from trucks, youthful pipe bands from the Home Counties and a miltary invasion of the City by the Armed Forces. The most surreal participants were a steam locomotive called Fenchurch, a huge yellow pea harvester and a full contingent of Pearlies. The money shot was Donald Campbell's Bluebird passing St Paul's Cathedral.
Sun 9: Perhaps the secret to Donald Trump versus the BBC is to apologise, shut up and rely on the fact he's bound to forget about suing you. Mon 10: One of the leaflets you can pick up at my local Tesco is a 64-page booklet detailing what's on at Norwich theatres (Jul 2025-Sep 2026). They are indeed excellent venues and my Dad attends regularly, but I can't imagine anyone from Bow ever deciding to travel 100 miles for a matinee. Tue 11: The most questionably bizarre Remembrance tribute I've seen this year is this knitted poppyman in the centre of Chesham. He's holding a white dove, he's called Percy and this is his fifth year on the bench.
Wed 12: I think that's the greatest number of deer I've ever seen, just over a brick wall in Bushy Park. A safari enjoyed from the top deck of the Superloop! Thu 13: My youngest nephew's not often in London so I took him out to dinner and was delighted to discover that my 15 year-old loyalty card still works. I've now got seven stamps, and another two should mean a free pancake.
Fri 14: Since I last reported on Footpath 47, the waterside strip has been fairly brutally de-vegetated and fenced off as Barking Riverside hurtles towards its residential destiny. Sat 15: While in Whyteleafe I was thrilled to see my favourite advert, now somewhat faded, on a municipal noticeboard. I assume the council bought a job lot because I last saw it posted up near the start of London Loop section 5, but that sadly disappeared about ten years ago. Sun 16: As well as an arrest, I can confirm that my visit to Brixton's Windrush Square also included the obligatory background smell of weed.
Mon 17: The thing about Epping Forest Museum (now open Mondays) is that it's a bit motley and not as good as it could be, but still better than anything else in Waltham Abbey's high street. I would love to have found out more about the wall of 500 year-old wood panelling, "one of the most important treasures in the museum", but all the background information was on an interactive touchscreen and this had broken. Tue 18: I boarded the DLR in the one part of the train a primary school class hadn't occupied, only for a third primary school class to board one stop later. They couldn't all have been going to the Natural History Museum. Wed 19: The place to wash clothes on Bow Road has reopened after a refit, and now manages to describe itself as both a LAUNDERETTE (old sign) and LAUNDRETTE (new sign).
Thu 20: I was despatched to the shops to buy a pack of silver Rizlas and, after much bafflement at the counter, managed to return with the wrong-sized papers. I think that's the first time I've bought anything smoking-related since spending my pocket money on packs of chocolate cigarettes in the 1970s. Fri 21: I needed to confirm my identity to set up a GOV.UK One Login account. I had hoped that four emails and three six-digit codes would be sufficient but no, they then asked me to take a QR code to a designated Post Office. It took the postmistress about 20 attempts to scan my passport on her tablet, after which she had to step out from behind the counter and take my photograph. I have never been more relieved, and surprised, that there was no queue waiting.
Sat 22: I really should start making a list of Pimlico Plumbers numberplates I've spotted. Sun 23: A dozen other things I saw on my Brighton to Newhaven walk: a ridiculous hat shop, an avenue of elms, the end of a racecourse, whatever the chalky equivalent of mud is, an occupied Saxon church, a whopping windmill, a soggy leaflet dispenser, frothy 'snow' blowing up onto the clifftop, an isolated 186-step staircase, an estate of no-longer-mobile mobile homes, National Coastwatch tower with invite to come on up, properly downtrodden high street.
Mon 24: Speaking of libraries, my local is brilliant because you can walk in and pick up two new bestsellers for nothing. I enjoyed Kathy Burke's autobiography, which is bitty but frank, blunt and insightful. I sort-of enjoyed the Map Men's tribute to dodgy cartography, This Way Up, which was very entertainingly written but too many chapters were buried beneath a humorous pastiche and some felt a bit thin underneath. Tue 25: Comedian Richard Herring has now published his Warming up blog every day for 23 years. In today's anniversary post he writes "as far as I know, no one has yet blogged every day for 25 years - there is one person who might have blogged every day for over 23 years, though I keep forgetting his name and haven't checked his website for a while. Hopefully he has died by now and I will be the longest consecutive blogger in the world." In case that was me, I can assure Richard that I took a week off in 2006.
Wed 26:Mike Hall is the designer of 32 gorgeous retro London borough maps, originally inspired by this blog's 'jamjar' series (2004-2012). Now he and Londonist editor Matt Brown have published a chunky hardback called 'The Boroughs of London' (£30, all good bookshops) in which retro London maps feature very heavily, suitably annotated. It's very good. To promote the book Mike foolishly agreed to visit one borough and nip round all ten of its places of interest in a day, and it's partly my fault that the crowdsourced choice was Sutton ("London's least interesting borough?"). He then documented his whistlestop tour in a lengthy thread on Bluesky, and if you expand it all the way down to Hackbridge at dusk then maybe Mike would be more convinced it really was worth the effort. Thu 27: Started the day thinking we might go and see a 7th century church on the Dengie Peninsula but actually ended up meeting Hodge, Southwark Cathedral's resident cat.
Fri 28: I was shocked to see a box of Creme Eggs on sale at my local newsagent, given it's still November. I didn't dare ask how much they cost. They also had a box of new Cadbury's Biscoff chocolate eggs (the same size but filled with crunchy Lotus biscuit pieces & Biscoff spread). Sat 29: I went to the cinema tonight, and I might start going more often because nobody scanned our QR code tickets, we just walked in. I was also appalled that 'popcorn and a drink' now costs 50% more than seeing the film.
Sun 30: Don't worry, I've stopped my Christmas Countdown at the end of November, but rest assured I could have carried on for another 24 days. Answers to the puzzles were as follows...
Tuesday: The missing word was XMAS (ensuring every letter of the alphabet appeared at least once). Wednesday: There were a lot of possible solutions, including 418 + 5907 = 6325 and 935 + 1806 = 2741. Thursday: Victoria, Euston, Barking, Aldgate and Stockwell end in ANGEL (itself a Christmassy station). Friday: 9 first class stamps (£15.30) and 10 second class stamps (£8.70). Saturday: All the consonant-less carols are now in the comments box. Sunday: For the four Advent-Calendar-splitting solutions, click here.
10 important pre-Christmas tasks
• untangle the fairy lights
• stock up on batteries
• buy paracetemol
• check your smoke alarm
• renew Netflix subscription
• unblock chimney
• confirm width of oven
• hide the Monopoly set
• clear fridge space for cheesecake
• check your bin days
Railway stations with a festive flavour
Christchurch, Dunrobin Castle, Ivybridge, Maryhill, Maryland, Marylebone, Maryport, St Mary Cray, Merryton, Oxenholme, Shepherds Bush, Shepherd's Well, Sleights, Snow Hill, Snowdown, Starbeck, Starcross, Turkey Street, Ulleskelf
Ridiculously confident weather forecasts for Christmas Day in London
» 7°C: cloudy with rain and snow at times becoming all rain (Accuweather)
» 7°C: rain (OneWeather)
» 9°C: cloudy and wet (Weather Outlook)
» 9°C: bright and sunny (Weather 25)
» 10°C: bright and sunny (World-Weather)
Words that contain XMAS
exams, axioms, maxims, saxmen, Marxism, climaxes, examines, fauxgasm, maximise, Mexicans, mixtapes, paroxysm, smallpox, metataxis, omnisexual
Days until Christmas
🎄 25
🎄 390
🎄 755
🎄 1121
🎄 9887
🎄 50064
Poor sods whose birthday is Christmas Day
Louis Tomlinson (34), Alastair Cook (41), Armin van Buuren (49), Marcus Trescothick (50), Justin Trudeau (54), Ed Davey (60), Alannah Myles (67), Annie Lennox (71), Sissy Spacek (76), Eve Pollard (82), Princess Alexandra (89)
Boxing Day football fixtures in London
Millwall v Ipswich Town, AFC Wimbledon v Stevenage, Sutton United v Aldershot Town, Wealdstone v Boreham Wood, Dagenham & Redbridge v Hornchurch, Enfield Town v Chelmsford City
How Twixtmas works this year Thu 25: Christmas Day, get stuffed. Fri 26: Boxing Day, recover, relax. Sat 27: Yay it's a Saturday, remain on the sofa. Sun 28: Yay it's a Sunday, vegetate some more. Mon 29: Not worth going to work, remain in pyjamas. Tue 30: Time has lost all meaning, slob on. Wed 31: No exertion whatsoever in readiness for tonight. Thu 1: Official hangover bank holiday. Fri 2: Nobody's going back in today are they? Sat 3: Yay it's Saturday again, remain on the sofa. Sun 4: Yay it's Sunday again, vegetate some more. Mon 5: Bugger... but that was a great 11 days off.
Your Christmas puzzle
This Advent calendar starts tomorrow and is made from 24 squares.
Can you divide it into 2 identical shapes?
Can you divide it into 4 identical shapes?
Can you divide it into 6 identical shapes?
Can you divide it into 6 identical shapes that aren't rectangles?
20 things we learnt from TfL FoI requests in November 2025
1) TfL have not yet completed all the work to rename the London Overground lines, but should have finished by March. 2) As of September 2025, 64% of London's bus fleet is fitted with Intelligent Speed Assistance. 3) There is a speed restriction on the Central line in both directions between Stratford and Leyton. The eastbound speed restriction is as a result of in-train noise and the westbound restriction is as a result of a track defect. 4) Fare evasion rates on the Underground are estimated to be 4.8%, down from 4.9% in 2023/4 and 6.7% in 2022/3. 5) TfL stopped producing Oyster wallets more than 5 years ago in order to save money and reduce usage of plastic. 6) All London buses are fitting with a heating system. The temperature of the passenger saloon area is controlled fully automatically with setpoints based upon ambient air temperatures (e.g. when it's below 5°C outside it should be 13°C inside). 7) Mobile phone coverage will be introduced on the underground section of the Windrush line by December 2026. 8) There were 128,002 applications for the 60+ Oyster card last year. There had already been 126,216 by the end of September this year. 9) The longest night bus route is the N199 with a maximum length of 21.88 miles from Trafalgar Square to St Mary Cray Station (43.47 miles return journey distance). The N89 is second (21.3 miles) and the N9 is third (20.9 miles). 10) The new Piccadilly line stock presents unique engineering challenges because four of the carriages have no wheels ["24TS is different to all other LU/TfL Rolling Stock due to the ‘floating’ bridge cars (no wheels / bogies) supported by adjacent conventional cars"]. This means that the envelope swept by the train as it passes through tunnels, along gradients and round bends can be unpredictable ["Due to the complex nature of the bridge car in changeable geometry/cant, current practices are unable to assess steps & gaps en-masse"]. 10 platforms currently have "non-compliant clearance", including Piccadilly Circus p4, South Kensington p3 and Ickenham p1. n.b. If you're an engineer, a journalist or an inquisitive soul with a mechanical bent you might like to dig further into "the presentation slides used in a talk given to the Permanent Way Institution on the evening of 4 June 2025" because an astonishing amount of techy stuff needs assurance before the new trains can enter public service.
11) The provisional date to publish the next tube map is 29 June 2026. 12) In August 1,136,358 vehicles paid £15,979,364 to travel in the Congestion Zone, while 1,711,305 vehicles paid £4,937,880 to drive through the Blackwall or Silvertown tunnels. 13) Over the last recorded 30 day period, there were 19 days when the Woolwich Ferry operated with only one vessel at some point during the day. 14) English National Concessionary Passes are not recognised by TfL bus readers because they are encoded differently to Oyster cards and contactless cards and devices, so should be shown to the driver when boarding a bus. 15a) The SL12 will terminate at Rainham Ferry Lane because it's the easiest place to locate a bus stand (and closes a network hole). 15b) Two route options for the SL13 were considered. Ealing to Hendon was chosen over Wembley to Wood Green because demand would be stronger to the west of Brent Cross. 15c) The SL14 will terminate at Chingford Hatch because it's the easiest place to locate a bus stand (and no parallel rail connections exist). 15d) Running the SL15 to Woolwich would have had strong demand but the route would have been too long to run reliably so Eltham will be the eastern terminus instead. 15e) The SL13 will be introduced on 1st August 2026. The SL14 will be introduced no earlier than 28th February 2026. The SL15 will be introduced no earlier than 1st February 2027. 16) If you continue to submit too many FoI requests, TfL will refuse to tell you how thick the padding on bus seats should be and why there are no buses on Christmas Day.
a) London's next dead bus(route 349)
n.b. not actually the next dead bus because the 283 is being withdrawn/renumbered in two weeks time.
There are too many buses on Caledonian Road, Seven Sisters Road and Tottenham High Road so TfL plan to trim some. In particular they've noted that "route 349 overlaps significantly with other services" so intend to withdraw it. The 349 runs between Ponders End and Stamford Hill and was introduced in 2004 to bolster services up the Tottenham High Road.
In mitigation the 279 will be diverted at its southern end to terminate at Stamford Hill, which is where the 349 currently stops. Existing passengers on route 349 can just catch the 279 instead, no issues. Existing 279 passengers intending to go all the way to Manor House can instead catch the 259 (which'll be easy because the two routes overlap a lot).
In mitigation the 259 will be extended at its northern end to terminate at Ponders End, which is where the 349 currently stops. However the southern end of the 259 will then be cut back, this time terminating at Holloway rather than King's Cross. Existing 259 passengers intending to go beyond Holloway can catch the 17 or 91 (but the overlap is poor and it'll be a pain). TfL reckon these changes will break 18% of journeys currently made on route 259 (but only 2% of journeys on route 279 and ½% on route 349).
This is my not very good map. I've included the 149, which isn't changing, because it overlaps the other three routes for three miles.
The 349's days are numbered. Some people will now face less convenient journeys and longer waits for a bus, but TfL are really only whipping away a nice-to-have rather than a necessity. The consultation ends 23rd January.
b) London's next new bus(route 10)
n.b. not actually the next new bus because the SL11, SL12, SL13, SL14, SL15 and 454 may be lined up first.
Routes 19 and 38 are stalwarts of the bus network, both longstanding high-frequency routes which overlap for three miles between Angel and Hyde Park Corner. It's time to shake them up, or more rightly cut them back and let a new route take up the slack.
Route 38 has been running from Victoria since 1927, its current northern terminus at Clapton Pond. The new plan is to lop off the southern end so that buses from Hackney terminate at Holborn, no longer passing through the West End, removing 2 miles through often slow traffic.
Route 19 has been running from Finsbury Park since 1934, its current southern terminus at Battersea Bridge. The new plan is to divert it at Hyde Park Corner to follow the abandoned section of route 38 to Victoria, no longer passing through Knightsbridge and Chelsea, removing 2 miles through often slow traffic.
Route 10 has been going spare since 2018 when the last bus with that number was withdrawn. Now TfL intend to resurrect it for a new route bolstering the central section of the other two routes. It'll start on the Balls Pond Road, shadow the current 38 all the way to Hyde Park Corner, then follow the abandoned section of route 19 to Battersea Bridge.
This is my not very good map. TfL have produced a geographic version if you'd prefer more detail.
It feels like sacrilege but essentially it's all about shortening routes so they're more reliable, which is very much TfL's favourite game of late. The consultation ends 23rd January.
c) Ranking the Superloop
TfL released its annual Travel in London report last week, packed with data about how Londoners get around (or increasingly don't). And in amongst all the serious stuff, on page 60, is this table showing how many passengers are using each of the Superloop routes.
The figures are for a typical autumn weekday and allow us to compare all ten Superloop routes for the first time. The most popular by far is the SL8 which runs along the Uxbridge Road. Next come the two Heathrow routes, the SL9 to Harrow and the SL7 to Croydon. It's probably no coincidence that all three were pre-existing express routes renumbered for the Superloop. The most popular new route is the SL10 from Harrow to North Finchley, completing a clean sweep for west London.
This may be clearer on a map.
Superloop routes out east are less well used, southeast London especially so. The SL5 from Bromley to Croydon is by far the least used of the regular routes, although this may be because it's also the shortest. It's no surprise to see the peak-hours one-direction-only SL6 at the bottom of the heap with an unimpressive 1600 passengers daily. Meanwhile the new SL4 through the Silvertown Tunnel takes a creditable 6th place, although this may have a lot to do with it being free at the moment.
20 programmes on TV this Christmas
Amandaland Christmas Special, Festive Finish Line, Fleece Navidad, Gone Christmas Fishing, Inside the Factory Christmas Gingerbread Special, Is There Life Beyond Earth? (Christmas Lectures from the Royal Institution), Midnight Mass from The Church of Our Lady and the English Martyrs (Cambridge), Mrs Brown's Boys, Operation Mincemeat, Secrets of the Conclave, The Famous Five in Big Trouble on Billycock Hill, The Mandy Who Knew Too Much, The Room in the Tower, The Scarecrows' Wedding, The Videos That Sleighed, The Weasy Family, Titanic Sinks Tonight, Top of The Pops Review of The Year 2025, Two Doors Down Christmas Special, Wild London
15 programmes that are probably on TV this Christmas
The Good Life episode with the paper hats, The Vicar of Dibley episode with all the Christmas lunches, Blackadder's Christmas Carol, Elf, The Sound of Music, Death On The Nile, Evil Under The Sun, Easter Parade, The Snowman, Love Actually, Miracle on 34th Street, Die Hard, It's A Wonderful Life, All the Bonds, All the Harry Potters.
10 Christmas Markets 'near London'
» One Of Europe’s Best Christmas Market Is Under An Hour From London And Is Set Against England’s Most Beautiful Cathedral – It’s Completely Free To Enter (Winchester)
» This Medieval Town Just An Hour From London Has A Stunning Christmas Market With Donkeys, Live Carols And Lights – And It’s Open For One Weekend Only In December (Faversham)
» The UK’s Largest Authentic German Christmas Market Outside Of Germany And Austria Is Just Over An Hour From London – Where Traditional German Beers And Glühwein Flow Freely Alongside Pork Schnitzels (Birmingham)
» This Christmas Market Has Just Been Named Among The UK’s Best For 2025 And It’s Just 1.5 Hours From London – Set In The Heart Of A UNESCO Heritage City Full Of Cobblestones And Georgian Architecture (Bath)
» The Second Oldest Christmas Market In Europe Known As The ‘Capital Of Christmas’ Is Just Under Two Hours From London – This Magical Is Home To A 450-Year-Old Market And One Of The Tallest Decorated Trees In Europe (Strasbourg)
» This Medieval Christmas Market Just Under Two Hours From London Is One Of Europe’s Oldest Dating Back To The Late Middle Ages – And Direct Flights From London Start At £15 (Nuremberg)
» This Enchanting Christmas Market Held In The Grounds Of A Medieval Castle Opens This Friday: 120 Stalls, A Bavarian Food Village & A Festive Funfair—And It’s Just 2 Hours From London (Rochester)
» One Of The Most Beautiful Squares In The World Turns Into Europe’s Best Christmas Market – And It’s Just Two Hours From London On The Eurostar (Brussels)
» One Of Europe’s Newest Christmas Markets Has Just Opened And It’s Just Over Two Hours From London By Eurostar – This Brand New Swiss-Village Style Christmas Market Is Being Called One Of Europe’s Best (Paris outskirts)
» Europe’s Largest Christmas Market Has Opened Its Doors And It’s Just 3 Hours From London – A 280,000 M² Wonderland Filled Decorated Chalets, A Giant Ice Rink And A Flying Santa (Craiova, Romania)
Your Christmas puzzle
I spent exactly £24 on Christmas stamps.
How many of each did I buy?
It's The Bull & Egret in Covent Garden. Bulls and egrets aren't usually known as bedfellows, either in the natural world or symbolically, indeed I believe this is the only The Bull & Egret in the country.
The history of The Bull & Egret
The Bull & Egret pub in Covent Garden is a lasting tribute to the founders of the Football Association, who created the rules of the game more than 150 years ago. The pioneers of football met at the original Freemasons pub in 1863 to thrash out the laws of a game now played across the globe. Today there’s Football Association memorabilia and the perfect set-up to enjoy televised football, alongside pub food and a large selection of drinks.
It's not a helpful history, giving no explanation of bulls nor egrets nor how the origins of football come into this. The key missing fact is that this pub used to be called The Freemasons Arms, being close to the Grand Masonic Temple, so a good place for an apron-friendly drink. And the Football Association was indeed founded at the Freemasons Tavern on 26 October 1863 when secretary Ebenezer Cobb Morley convened a meeting which agreed the official laws of the game. The catch is that the Freemasons Tavern and Freemasons Arms were completely different pubs, the Tavern on Great Queen Street where The Connaught Rooms now stand, the Arms 200m away on Long Acre. The correct site even has a memorial plaque, and The Bull & Egret is merely being suggestive.
The actual history of The Bull & Egret The pub was first licensed in 1704 and was known as the Bull's Head until 1778, after which it became the Freemasons Arms. Originally owned by Charringtons, it was acquired by Sam Smith in 1985, Greene King in 1988 and Shepherd Neame in 2003. Earlier this year it was purchased by two blokes called Callum Murphy and Will St John who run a chummy pubco, and in July they renamed it The Bull & Egret.
That explains the Bull - it's a reference to the pub's original name - but the Egret still baffles me.
Update: The cattle egret (Ardea ibis) is a stocky heron originally native to the tropics, now more widely established globally. The birds often spend time close to large grazing animals to grab the insects and worms their hooves disturb, hence 'Bull & Egret' would be a common foraging pair. Thanks Peter!
And what of other unusual combinative names?
London has hundreds of pubs named the Something & Something and not all of those make obvious sense either. I ploughed through a database of 4000 London pub names and tried to uncover the reasons behind the strangest pairings.
Some make perfect sense:
» Fox & Hounds, Dog & Duck, Hare & Hounds (country pursuits)
» Coach & Horses, Horse & Groom, Cart & Horses (early travel)
» Rose and Crown (the War of the Roses)
» George & Dragon (our patron saint)
» Crown and Anchor (naval symbols)
» Crown & Sceptre (Crown Jewels)
» Bat & Ball (sports)
Some you can see why the two might be paired:
» Star & Garter (badge of the Order of the Garter)
» Hook & Cleaver, Lamb & Trotter (Smithfield meat market)
» Hoop & Grapes, Cork & Bottle (beer & wine)
10 tough Christmas dilemmas
• your parents or the parents-in-law?
• brandy butter or custard?
• real tree or artificial?
• say thanks or admit you hate it?
• hibernate or go party?
• send cards or WhatsApp?
• sprouts or no sprouts?
• heating on or another jumper?
• charades, Netflix or Xbox?
• embrace it or hide away?
30 Christmas groceries to stock up in advance
Meltis New Berry Fruits, Paxo sage and onion stuffing, Quality Street/Roses/Heroes, After Eights, Warninks Advocaat, Baileys Irish Cream, salted peanuts, mint Matchmakers, tinned ham, Lebkuchen, chocolate Advent calendar, selection of crackers, panettone, chocolate liqueurs, Jacobs Cheese Footballs, Fry's Turkish Delight, tin of 'luxury' chocolate biscuits, goose fat, Terry's Chocolate Orange, walnuts, jar of cranberry sauce, Twiglets, tin of shortbread, Bendicks Mint Collection, cheese with bits of cranberry, box of Maltesers, stem ginger biscuits, Shloer.
45 Squared 42) ST GEORGE'S SQUARE, SE8
Borough of Lewisham, 70m×40m
For my Lewisham square I headed to the borough's northernmost point and a drab postmodern piazza with a significant backhistory. The Thames laps one edge, bang opposite the Isle of Dogs, its broad sweep best viewed from a short concrete jetty. To the north is Greenland Dock, one of whose boatyards abuts the Square behind a messy fence. Everything else round here is lowrise flats and housing, part of the Deptford Wharf development circa 1992, which is also when St George's Square officially sprang to life.
It comprises a long rectangular open space, securely bollarded to deter joyriders, with an avenue of hornbeam trees down the centre. Originally it was all paved but around 15 years ago the council decided to soften the vibe by replacing the outer stripes with lawn and shrubbery. The grass is now pretty threadbare, in some places just mud, and the bushes have shrunk back like receding gums. The benches hold little appeal on a dank day in November but must still be used because an avalanche of bottles, pizza boxes and empty laughing gas canisters tumbled around the litter bins. A passing dogwalker looked at me with a look of despair suggesting she wasn't impressed either.
One flank comprises 11 pseudo-terraced townhouses, very much of their era, and the other is a dead end used as a parking free-for-all by cars, vans and the occasional small truck. Prior to residentialisation this whole area had a proud maritime history, being the northernmost extent of the riverside hubbub known as Deptford Strand. The first dock opened here in 1604 and by the 18th century was a major shipbuilding yard assembling large seagoing vessels for the East India Company and the Royal Navy. In 1850 Dudman's Dock was purchased by the Brighton and South Coast Railway for the transhipment of coal around its railway network, the landing quay crisscrossed by cranes and wagons, none of which is evident now because British Rail abandoned the site in 1970.
What you will find is the site of an even older relic called St George's Stairs, one of several sets of steps in tidal London providing public access to the Thames. The staircase here is plainly a modern replacement, being slippery concrete rather than slippery timber, and because I arrived near high tide merely led down into turbulent water. I know from previous visits that a small beach opens up at low tide where beachcombing is possible, though perhaps not advised because, as a large yellow sign facing the river duly warns, Sewer Outlet 30 Metres From This Board.
What seeps out here beneath a low concrete slab are the slurried waters of one of London's lost rivers, the Earl's Sluice, a waterway with a considerable geographical significance. Between here and South Bermondsey station it marks the approximate dividing line between the boroughs of Southwark and Lewisham, and prior to 1899 marked the precise boundary between Surrey and Kent. The Surrey Docks were the other side, obviously, and what's now Deptford Wharf was somehow once part of the same county as Canterbury and Dover. A few metres upstream is the boundary stone that used to grace the last bridge across the Earl's Sluice, delimiting St Mary's parish Rotherhithe and St Paul's parish Deptford. But the modern sewer now ends marginally in former Kent, and my understanding is that St George's Square is an undeveloped stripe to avoid building on the mucky tunnel underneath.
13 times some people think Christmas begins
• when Harrods opens its Christmas department
• when mince pies appear in the shops
• when Channel 5 starts showing Christmas films
• after Hallowe'en
• after Guy Fawkes
• after Thanksgiving
• Advent Sunday
• December 1st
• when you hear Wham/Mariah/Slade on the radio
• December 6th
• when the double issue Radio Times is published
• Christmas Eve
• Midnight Mass, liturgically speaking
Your Christmas puzzle
I C E
+ S N O W (O = 0)
X M A S
Each letter in this sum stands for a different digit.
Can you find a solution? (there are several ways to do it)
But I was surprised to see there's another Mill Hill. This one's a peak in the middle of Barnes Common, nowhere near the better known suburb in Barnet, at least according to a triangular symbol on OpenStreetMap.
I wasn't aware of a hill in the area, indeed Barnes is well known for being fairly flat. I checked on an Ordnance Survey map and there were no local contours at all. I checked on a topographic map and there was no evidence of significant variation above sea level. So I went along to Barnes Common to take a look for myself.
This is where Mill Hill is supposed to be, a patch of woodland just off the main road a few minutes from the railway station. No obvious hump was apparent. The precise point's in those trees so I left the obvious path and followed a brambly track into the wood as far as the supposed hilltop. It was not there. I found ivy-clad trunks, holly with berries and thick undergrowth but not even a mound, let alone a hump. There is no hill at this Mill Hill.
This 'hill' has been on OpenStreetMap for almost 16 years according to the data in the underlying changeset. I wondered if it might be a deliberate error introduced for copyright reasons, but OpenStreetMap is crowdsourced and free-to-use so it can't be that. I wondered if a local orienteering map might have further information, the Common being a perfect spot for a competitive run-around, and that suggested this spot's actually a slight depression. All things considered I think it's a mistake that's been hiding in plain sight since 2010, and may not survive until the end of 2025.
But there is a Mill Hill here, as you may have spotted on the earlier map, about 200m to the northwest. So I went there instead.
It's a real peculiarity, an enclave of ten large houses adrift on the common and surrounded by trees. It's almost precisely square and impossible to walk into the centre, each house presenting a gated and/or walled frontage to the world. Weirder still three sides have a narrow road alongside where residents get to park and the fourth is a main road where they can't. According to a sign the maximum speed is 10 MPH and according to a fingerpost the loop is a "public byway open to all traffic", so I wouldn't recommend more than 5. It's an impressively defensive site, a huddle of twisty chimneys and gothic turrets all with a multi-million pound price tag. And it used to be a windmill.
There's been a windmill here since the 15th century, because even at only 28 feet above sea level it's marginally the highest ground in Barnes. It's been sequentially a post mill, a smock mill and a tower mill, the 1740 version having been blown down in a hurricane. Shortly afterwards the miller was permitted to enclose a patch of common measuring 260 x 267 feet, and all the subsequent housing has remained within this footprint. The oldest is Mill Hill Lodge which contains part of the miller's cottage, and can be found on the western side of the residential island where the rest of the listed buildings are. The mill was finally demolished in 1838 so don't come expecting a romantic view, just a Neighbourhood Watch poster and a square of well-hidden real estate.
It may only be a hill by default, its elevation barely distinguishable amid the surrounding dog-walking territory. But it is officially a second Mill Hill, and if anywhere needs a little triangle on Open StreetMap it's the gatepost in the above photograph and not the flat bit on the common.
n.b. There is potentially a third Mill Hill in Acton, so I went there too.
It started out as Mill Hill Fields, a cattle meadow on the banks of the Stamford Brook where it's thought a windmill once stood. In 1809 a City lawyer bought the land and built a grand mansion called Acton Hill House, "a beautiful estate with a fine avenue of elms". In 1877 the estate was sold to Chislehurst builder William Willett, he of Daylight Saving Time fame, who covered the site with his trademark smart gabled houses. The ornamental garden of the former manor house became the local tennis club and survives today as a tiny park scattered with playground equipment, unlocked at 7.30am daily. And all this now forms the Mill Hill Park conservation area because Willett's project was called Mill Hill Park, indeed the local station was originally called Mill Hill Park rather than Acton Town. So although its streets are very pleasant I'd argue it's not really a proper Mill Hill... just the two are sufficient.
9am update: You've spotted a trig point on Barnes Common, in pretty much the right location, which was depicted on OrdnanceSurveymaps published before WW2. 10am update: Aha, Gary Lineker lives in the Mill Hill (Barnes) enclave. noon update: Dan, who added the hill symbol to OpenStreetMap in the first place, has left a comment: "It looks like I may have conflated an old trig point location with the nearby locality name of Mill Hill." He adds "It's always good to have more eyes on open data to check mistakes haven't been made, and I think if that was added now, somebody would pick up on it much sooner." midnight update: Mill Hill has been deleted from OpenStreetMap (although I can still see it).
X-25
That explains the Bull - it's a reference to the pub's original name - but the Egret still baffles me.
